After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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