There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
