I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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