do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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