He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
