I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
