We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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