Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
Randomize
