Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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