UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
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