i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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