I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
