Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
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