if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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