I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
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