if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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