remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize