you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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