Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Randomize
