There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Randomize
