you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
Randomize
