Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Randomize
