My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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