If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
