Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize