i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Randomize
