I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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