Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(909): View more from California

I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

why does my vagina smell like weed?

(215): View more from Pennsylvania

omg thats a great idea

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(630): View more from Illinois

I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....

(1-630): View more from Illinois

which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?

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(269): View more from Michigan

I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.

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These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women
Read it at the TFLN blog
(563): View more from Iowa

I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.

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(248): View more from Michigan

No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage

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(309): View more from Illinois

he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel

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(806): View more from Texas

You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.

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(807): View more from Ontario

I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!

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