why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Then again, he has huge mansions.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.