is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize
