found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
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