I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I would ride that face into the sunset
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
