He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
