sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Randomize
