No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
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