"it" just moved
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Randomize
