i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
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