We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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