I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
You need a sexual gate keeper
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Randomize
