girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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