No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
Randomize
