I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Randomize
