Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
