Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
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