your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Randomize
