You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
