when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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