Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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