these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
