Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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