no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
