don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Randomize
