I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
COCAINE IS GR8
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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