im gay
i know
yea but for you.
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
